Routine vs no routine

Baby Routine

Baby Routine

Routine or no routine?

Which ever your method of madness, one thing is for sure. It’s personal.

We can gain advice from others, but when it comes down to it, it’s whatever works for you, the family and baby.

Some people love a routine, finding freedom in the structure (claiming it assists the baby in feeling secure and comfort, as they know what comes next), where as others prefer to go with the flow and follow the babies lead.

There really is no right or wrong, but studies have found that most babies actually develop their own routine, or pattern, which they eventually fall into, even if we the parents aren’t planning on developing a routine or daily schedule.

I personally love routine. I’ve found that my babies generally have slept better and have been happier when we know what’s happening each day. Harrison in particular craves order and still now, at 6 years old, needs to know what is happening each day to relax. With the other two, the routine wasn’t as strict in the early days, however I’ve noticed how much better life is, even now, if we have some regular routine and order. I believe this helps them feel safe and secure.

You night be 100% against it and that’s ok. Whatever the choice, I just keep reminding myself that as long as I keep listening to my gut and go with it, everything will work out. I wish the same thing for you x

If you are pregnant right now or have a newborn and would like to see what I did, I’ve listed it below for you. I hope it helps 🙂

Routine for 1 Month Old Baby

The first month really is like the fourth trimester. During this time I found that no rules apply. Hugs, warm cosy snuggles, a great bed and milk pretty much sums it up for me.

Routine for 2 Month Old Baby 

Around the 2nd month, I found the natural rhythm started to kick in. The pulling of the ears to show tiredness all of a sudden started happening at around the same time each day. That’s when I knew the natural routine had kicked in.

To provide comfort I used my song  ‘Have a Little Rest‘ before it was time to sleep (even when out). I found this worked as a trigger to remind them what was happening, they heard the song, relaxed and went to sleep happily.

As far as routine, that was pretty much it. Every month it would change as the sleep needed wasn’t quite as long. Harrison was a short sleeper and Vancouver and Beau were both long sleepers, however the same fact remained…they all went to sleep happily.

If you wanted to go a step further, you could even start playing some of these songs whilst pregnant. You’ll be surprised how baby recognises them and settles in the outside world. More here.

I’m always happy to share and love to hear your stories, so please do contact me if you wanted more information on any of this.

You are amazing and remember, whatever you choose to do, it’s the right thing!

Lots of love,

Kris xxx

To learn more on the music and books Kris created for her children follow the links below.

Sing Baby Sing – sing, play and soothe baby.

Black and White Stories For Babies – help babies eyes grow and develop.

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How to find your mothers instinct

Trusting Your Instinct

Mothers Instinct. Only now have I learnt how to listen to it and how to trust it.

Quick story: after a recent trip to the doctors (a basic cold turned into a rash situation – Harry, 2 1/2 years), the doctor noticed Harry’s glands raised a little more then they should have be – “I’m 99.9% sure there’s nothing wrong, however, if you’re worried, then I’m worried”.

It turned out that this doctor had recently encountered a number of parents with children who hadn’t shown any sign of serious illness, however, the parents still felt the need to investigate. Against her professional opinion and on further testing, they did in fact discover that these children did have the particular illnesses their parents believed they had.

How amazing is that?! An instinct could save a life!

This made me question just how much I use and trust my instinct when dealing with the boys.

Below are a few tricks which helped me discover my mothers instinct. If you’re struggling to find yours, I hope his helps x

1. Sleep / Yoga. Sleep; if I don’t sleep, I 100% don’t function. If I do sleep…watch out world here I come! This point is a little laughable though, as if parents of young babies ever have much of this! So if sleep is not an option, I use yoga. It would be lovely to exit the building to do this, but in times of desperation, the shower it is. Breathing deeply and freeing the mind. When I’m done, I find I have a clearer mind and the ability to be present and in the moment.

2. Music. I’ve been using music or singing (whichever is quickest to get to), to stop the tears and create a little quiet amidst the madness. It’s so much easier to think and listen to your gut when there’s no screaming in the background. Click HERE for the music I use and created (using my instinct) – couldn’t live without it!

2. Observation. If I’m stuck in the middle of tantrum city, I find I use music or singing to create the quiet, however, if I can…I stand back and watch. Last week, as I stood back and watched Harry play with his brother Vancouver (1 yrs) and friends, I worked out that his tears and tantrums could possibly be fixed with a little one on one time with me. Turned out I was right, seemed to do the trick. A change up of toys also helped (a busy toddler is a happy one :))

3. A hug. It’s amazing how you can instantly work out what’s going on with a hug. Adults do it all the time, if you’re angry, the hug will feel icy, if you’re feeling affectionate, the hug will feel warm; it’s the same with babies and toddlers. This morning I hugged Vancouver, he couldn’t care less, he struggled free and pulled my hand to help him walk. I then hugged Harry, he clung on and wouldn’t let go, he needed some one on one time with mummy before running off happily. I felt what they needed from the hug. Click HERE for more on hugging and its benefits (healing, boosting self esteem…amazing!)

These are just a few things which have helped me. The biggest has been creating space in my mind, so then when something happens and my instinct kicks in, I can hear it. For me it didn’t happen naturally, I had to learn it, create space for it and then practise listening. I found that the more I listened, the more I heard.

I hope this helps you too and I hope you too can find the peace and the empowerment which comes from hearing and using the mothers instinct.

Lots of love,

Kris xxx

To learn more on the music and books Kris created for her children follow the links below.

Sing Baby Sing – sing, play and soothe baby.

Black and White Stories For Babies – help babies eyes grow and develop.

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How to prepare for baby during pregnancy

I remember when I was pregnant with my first son Harrison. My period was late, however I couldn’t be sure, so I ducked into the toilets during my lunch break at work with a test.

I had my First Response Pregnancy Test in hand and after a quick glance, I was relieved that there was only one line… not pregnant. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely wanted to have babies, however Jonathon and I were still enjoying our new relationship and we were just about to set off on a cheeky Thailand Getaway.

I went to throw the test out and all of a sudden stopped. There were now…two lines!!!

The rest is history. I stood shaking for awhile and the feeling of shock very quickly turned to excitement, then panic, then back to shock. Jonathon couldn’t have been happier and our cheeky Thailand Getaway changed into a Baby Moon.

During this pregnancy time, I worried. I felt calm, I stressed out and then I worried again. The range of emotions I felt whilst pregnant were huge. I remember standing at the supermarket trying to buy cheese however I had forgotten why I was there, so just started crying hysterically haha.

I became obsessed with my baby’s development and growth inside me. ‘This week my baby is the size of a blueberry; this week a watermelon’. I downloaded Baby Centre’s Pregnancy Tracker. It was so much fun!

I then read every single post I could find on google about new mums, how best to prepare, what to buy for baby, what to pack in the hospital bag, what to eat when pregnant and which routine to follow when baby was born.

I read the books and took on advise – I became an expert. I knew everything there was to know about new babies. I probably even knew more then mums who had babies already, or so I thought 🙂

Then Harrison was born. Wow. My first thought was:

It’s a real baby!’

It was so hard to comprehend. It was SO amazing! I was on a high.

After leaving the hospital and arriving home safely, with new cargo in tow, the biggest shock was his crying. The routines in the books didn’t work or seem to suit, he constantly cried and I was too tired to figure out what to do. It was so hard. Other mums were posting beautiful, happy pictures on facebook and my reality was very different.

I did in the end find a solution so don’t worry or let me panic you, I wrote music and stories which 100% helped (here’s the link if you wanted to read more), however this blog is about what I learnt while I was pregnant, in hopes that it might help/inspire you.

So here’s what I would tell my FIRST TIME PREGNANT SELF:

Enjoy this time – most definitely enjoy tracking baby’s development, preparing clothes, preparing the nursery, going to those important mid wives appointments, it’s amazing. Enjoy the process but also yourself, how amazing is your body?!

Connect with yourself and baby – exercise is so powerful in centering the mind and feeling at one with baby, so is pregnancy yoga. In these times of silence,  I started to really connect with myself and my baby.

Listen to that inner voice – during exercise and yoga, I started to create space in my mind and I became aware if I needed certain foods or needed more water. The more I listened to my body, the more I heard. I also found that as I practised listening to myself (inner voice/mothers instinct), all the books I read became just that, books of facts that were helpful if needed, however were secondary to what my inner voice had to say.

Keep it up -I started doing this alot with my second pregnancy and then when Vancouver was born, I felt I could really hear when the mothers instinct kicked in. Even now, with 3 small boys in tow I find if I’m busy, I don’t hear as much. However if I make time for exercise or yoga, I’m back on track and can hear clearly.

So please, if you’re where I was at, take a note from me and what I have learnt: be easy on yourself, trust yourself and enjoy.

Sending you all the happiness in the world!

Lots of love, Kris xx

To learn more on the music and books Kris created for her children follow the links below.

Sing Baby Sing – sing, play and soothe baby.

Black and White Stories For Babies – help babies eyes grow and develop.

 

 

 

The perfectly imperfect parent

kristinagPerfectly imperfect. I love it. It’s something I’m coming to terms with.

As a mum of two boys under the age of 4 years and another on the way, an immaculate kitchen, polished floors and neatly folded clothes is something of the past.

Instead, it’s spaghetti thrown around the room like art, ice cream poured into the rug and clothes used as piles to jump from whilst pretending to be a super hero.

During the newborn stage it was even worse. The perfect white outfit covered in vomit, the sparkling car covered in crumbs, wrappers, unknown smelly objects and a usually spotless bag filled with empty wrappers, old baby food tubes, spilled formula and hundreds of 5 cent coins.

Lets call it a comedy. Starring me. Or some days, a horror film 🙂

But here’s the thing, being a perfectionist, always wanting the best for the kids and striving to help them in their social, emotional and physical development, is REALLY hard when you are striving for perfection. Clean kitchen, house and children. THAT, takes up the day. The end.

But one day my gorgeous husband (he’s reading this so…) and super amazing, hot and luscious 🙂 (actually, seriously!) mentioned that he would rather come home to mess, me rested and all of us happy. ?!?! So I tried it.

It was messy and not one bit nice. The dishes were falling off the benches, the washing was slung from the rooftop, literally, however the boys and I had played, sung, danced and read together. We even had time to create characters, draw pictures and play make believe. So then when the husband came home…we were imperfectly happy!

Does this mean we’ll live in mess forever and ever amen? N.O. But it does mean that I’m learning how being imperfect can actually be pretty perfect!

Here’s to fun, crazy and messy days!

Kris xo

 

* Don’t forget to check out Bubsi Brain’s music and books helping you lead an easier and happier life.

CAR MUSIC – keep baby and the kids settled in the car

DEVELOPMENT GUIDES – follow the music development guide

CAPTIVATING BABY BOOKS -help baby’s eyes develop as you read

The secret to a settled baby

Settling Baby

Help with settling baby.

Is there a secret to a settled and happy baby? Yes, I think there is!

In our household, we have always used my music to help if our babies have been unsettled. For example, during the hiccups we might sing ‘Hiccups Please Go Away’ (while we bounce), before rest time sing ‘Have a Little Rest’, during nappy change time sing ‘Changing the Nappy’ and during an unsettled tummy time sing ‘Tttt Tum’ etc.

And if you havn’t already, it’s most definitely worth taking a look here, however this post, I believe, contains the secret to changing our view on baby settling.

I truly believe that the secret to a happy, settled baby is:

…You!

When it comes to looking after our new baby, it can be so easy to focus all of our attention on this. So much so, that we forget to think about or look after ourselves.

Even taking a shower can be such a mission. This however, I believe is the key to your baby’s happiness.

It all stems from you and me. If we can look after ourselves, get ourselves feeling good and happy, then most of the time, baby will follow in mood.

Now I know that sometimes there will be instances where there is actually a problem, such as teething, reflux, hunger or tiredness and no amount of mummy feeling great will touch the sides. However, if this feel good mood doesn’t rub off on baby, then at least being in this state of happiness means we can cope better and have the brain space to hear that inner voice (mothers instinct) when it tells us what to do.

Now all this sounds good in theory BUT…

How on earth do we find time each day to look after ourselves?

This is 100% personal. For me, I don’t have the luxury of family close by to help each week. For some, this is the answer to time alone and space.

My solution is to tag team with the hubby, head to the gym or call in a sitter. It’s gotten to the point where we have noticed just how much we need this self care time, that we have had to schedule it in and write it on the calendar.

It’s hard, it’s uncomfortable, but it’s worth it. A settled mummy, is a settled baby. And if not a settled baby, then it’s a happy mummy who can now deal with settling the little one 🙂

It’s a simple revelation but easy to forget. I’m hoping this has reminded you too to set aside that special time out for yourself each week. You are worth it and everyone, including baby, will thank you for doing it!

Lots of love,

Kris xxx

To learn more on the music and books Kris created to help settle her children follow the links below.

Sing Baby Sing – sing, play and soothe baby.

Black and White Stories For Babies – help babies eyes grow and develop.

 

Can baby brain make you happy?

Baby brainThis week I have had a serious case of baby brain. Loads of ‘duh’ moments. My husband, if reading this can testify, poor man. Where are my keys? (right infront of me), where’s the baby? (under my feet), what are we having for dinner? (we’ve had dinner).

Some scientists believe in baby brain, others don’t. But regardless of the scientific facts, I believe I have it…bad.

But rather then getting upset with the memory loss or serious lack of multitasking abilities (you know how it goes – walking into a room…hmm why am I here?) I decided to embrace it…best thing ever! Here’s why –

I learnt that Baby Brain can make you happy. How? Read below (ps. better then thinking you’ve gone mad right?!)

How can Baby Brain makes you happy?


1. Forces you to be in the moment
(if you let it off course). On the days when there’s not much brain power around, I’ve started hanging out with the boys and just following them around. Playing ball, watching little insects do their insect thing…it’s therapeutic and I always end up feeling refreshed and happy. Living in the moment is an amazing thing! Click HERE for a great article on living in the moment.

2. Gives perspective. I am admittedly a workaholic. I love to write music and books and am always trying to find new ways  to interact with the boys (1 yr and 3 yrs). Great as it is (still use it everyday! Music HERE, books HERE), sometimes, I can get way too involved in a certain project and forget about just enjoying time with my boys. This week however, I let it all go. When the boys had their daytime naps, instead of working, I (please don’t judge me 🙂 ), watched reality television. Not just one day but…all week!!! Then, because I had some ‘me’ time, I was able to really enjoy the boys. And now, because I’ve had time away from my projects, I have perspective. I feel fresh and excited about it all again. I’m not saying reality TV is the answer but ‘me’ time 100% is, whatever that looks like. Click HERE on how to insert a little ‘me’ time into your day.

3. Helps you do what you actually want to do, not what you need to do. The strange thing about truly being in the moment, is that yes, perspective does come, but also, I found I ended up doing things which I’ve been wanting to do for so long. Because I had pushed away all the things I thought I had to do (thanks to the baby brain), I naturally started doing things I wanted to do i.e cleaning and making our house a haven. Cleaning?! I know, I’m weird. But simply placing pictures and plants in different spots, rearranging rooms, toys etc. I managed to create this amazing, happy space. Such a satisfying feeling! I know for others this sounds like torture, but it can be anything…excerise, finishing that letter or email which has been sitting there forever, whatever. Such a great feeling to finally get it done!

So, in wrapping this up, my point is – baby brain can be great. Who would have thought it could actually make you happy?! Hoping this helps you too! Kris x

 

“Because being a mum is hard. Here I will blog on finding the energy to embrace each day, the boys, life and create new innovative baby development ideas and ways to soothe and settle babies / toddlers”

Photo credit: body + soul mum